From managing our kids’ education and social lives to cleaning the house and ensuring the bills get paid on time, there is a lot that goes into running a household and sometimes as mums, it feels like it falls on our shoulders the most.
A new study has revealed that mothers overwhelmingly carry this ‘mental load’ while fathers often take a back seat.
This strain, also known as ‘cognitive household labour’, refers to the thinking work needed to keep family life running smoothly – including scheduling, planning and organising tasks.
Conducted in the US, the study found that mothers take on 71% of all household mental load tasks, ranging from planning meals and arranging activities to managing household finances.
Analysis of responses from 3,000 parents also found that fathers are more likely to see mental labour as equally shared, while mothers disagree.
Dr Ana Catalano Weeks, one of the study authors from the University of Bath, said: ‘This kind of work is often unseen, but it matters. It can lead to stress, and burnout and even affect women’s careers. In many cases, resentment can build, creating strain between couples.
‘We hope our research sparks conversations about sharing the mental load more fairly – something that benefits everyone.’
Other examples of ‘mental load’ tasks include keeping track of washing towels and sheets, throwing away children’s clothes that no longer fit, planning birthday parties, scheduling dentist appointments, noticing when children’s nails need to be cut, remembering when a boiler needs servicing, co-ordinating play dates and throwing out old food.
A recent study also showed that working mothers are twice as likely as fathers to consider reducing their hours or leaving their jobs because of parental responsibilities.
‘Going forward, the challenge for governments and employers who care about attracting the top talent is how to create policies that are supportive of both mothers and fathers sharing the unpaid work at home,’ Dr Catalano Weeks added.
‘One policy that comes to mind is well-paid, gender-neutral parental leave – which we are way behind on compared to the rest of Europe.’
Researchers said they would encourage families to start to talk about the mental load, make a plan and work together to make every day more balanced